Do You Know Your Identity?

Everyone longs for a purpose and identity. We all have an inherent desire to know who we are and what we were created for. I believe many of us go through life scared to accept our true identity. We are scared of what may happen once we fully embrace our purpose here on earth. 

Recently I have come to find my identity. In the past, I found my identity through people and things in hopes it would fulfill me and fill that void. I felt empty and unfulfilled because people and things cannot fill my cup or soothe my longing to know my true purpose. I didn’t feel worthy enough to be myself. I wanted to be accepted by people, yet I didn’t even accept or love who I was. I fed myself with narrative lies, and those lies dimmed my light. The truth is, listening to those lies distracted me from stepping into my calling, my true identity, and my purpose. It was unhealthy, but it felt good at the moment. Unresolved issues in my past haunted me and skewed my outlook on life. I didn’t feel worthy enough to have an identity outside of what other people thought and the things I possessed.

I went through a terrible depression in 2020 that caused me to spiral. I knew that some of the trauma and past life experience that I had not dealt with was beginning to rear its ugly head. I felt lost and I wasn’t sharing this with anyone. I would tell myself false narratives of what a terrible person I was,  how unworthy I was to be an entrepreneur and have healthy relationships. The shame of depression caused me to further spiral into a place of not knowing my true identity.  I was at the bottom, and I knew I needed to address some of these deep-rooted issues.

I found a therapist, and I began to work with her on my healing journey. She dug deep into the traumas of my past and my story. She gave me tools to help me work through my anxieties and depression. It was like a light bulb turned on; I realized that to heal, I needed to address and reveal those things that were holding me back. It was through peeling back the layers of trauma and loss that I found myself again. I found confidence and contentment in myself and realized that I need to allow God to help me soothe my soul. My identity was emerging.

In the past year, I have learned this

 1. My identity is not in people or things.

 2. My identity ultimately comes from the Lord and my confidence in knowing I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

When you know your identity, everything else falls into place. You have better, more fulfilled relationships and are more confident because you know your worth. When you take steps to heal your past hurts and properly grieve the losses, you can affirm yourself through God’s word and the truth of who you are. Knowing your identity allows you to look at the bigger picture, recognizing that you are unique. Learning this helped me not only personally but also professionally.

Identity plays an integral part in your business. How many times do you look at your competition and want to “be them.” So you create your Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn posts to mirror your competition; this is often called Imposter Syndrome. If you don’t know your identity, how are you supposed to show up authentically in your business? You don’t want to be tied to the opinions of others, doubting yourself and who you are. It’s like being a feather in the wind.

The truth is, you aren’t them. We are all different, and we are all called to provide something unique to this world. 

Karrie Scott Garcia says, “If you run from your story, you run from your calling.”

Stepping into your calling means eliminating the lies you have told yourself and the lies others have spoken over you. Listening to those lies only keeps you from finding who you truly are. I encourage you to reflect on your self-talk. What are you telling yourself daily? Is it positive, or is it negative? What are you doing to “soothe” yourself?  Is it shopping, drinking, overeating? We all do unhealthy soothing when we are in a place of brokenness. So if you are struggling, get the help you need so you can step into your calling and purpose. You are worthy enough, and your story matters. Once you begin healing, you will see how your vulnerability to share and find your identity will help others in their journey.

How are you taking steps to find your identity?